The Curious Case of Marvin Garcia

The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. And what do you get at the end of it?

Death.

What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards.

You should die first, then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch and you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, and you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities. You become a little baby, you go back into the womb, spend your last nine months floating... and you finish off as an orgasm.

Now, that’s more like it. =)

Napanood ko ang “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” noong Sabado. Ang haba ng pelikula. Tatlong oras din yata akong nag isip kung paano ito matatapos. Kung ang katapusan nga ba ang simula o ang simula ang katapusan. Maraming nagsabi sa akin na ang pelikula daw ay tungkol sa kamatayan pero matapos ko itong mapanood, sa palagay ko’y mas tungkol ito sa buhay.

Madami-dami din naman akong nailuha habang pinapanood ko ito. Nakakahiya man sa nakakita o nakarinig sa akin ay wala na akong paki alam. Basta’t hinahayaan ko lang pumatak ang luha ko sa mga eksenang naisin nitong pumatak. Naisip ko, ano mang katapusan ay nagdudulot naman talaga sa atin ng kalungkutan. Kapag may nagpaalam, pag-ibig na natapos, kaibigang lumayo o di kaya’y mahal sa buhay na pumanaw. Ang tema ng paghihiwalay ay laging nag iiwan ng kurot sa ating mga puso.

Kung ako ang iyong tatanungin, maganda ang pelikula. Kung may panahon ka, panoorin mo ito. Ito ay sumasalamin sa katotohanan, pagpapatawad, pagmamahal at pagtanggap --- sa sarili at sa kapwa, sa mga kahinaan at lakas, sa mga kalabisan at mga pagkukulang.

Sa kalagitnaan ng pelikula, naisip ko, anong buhay nga ba ang mas may kabuluhan? Ang batang tumatanda sa paglipas ng panahon o ang matandang bumabata habang tumatakbo ang oras? May pagkaka iba kaya? Mas marami bang maaaring matutunan ang isang taong bumabata kaysa sa isang taong nag kaka edad?

Ipinanganak si Benjamin Button na isang sanggol na animo’y may kung anong karamdaman. Ang itsura nya ay maihahalintulad sa isang taong may edad na 70. Namatay ang kanyang ina habang sya ay isinisilang. At dahil nga sa hindi pangkaraniwan ang kanyang itsura ay iniwan sya ng kanyang sariling ama sa hagdanan ng isang gusaling kumukupkop sa mga taong matatanda. Dalawang uri ng pagmamahal ang makikita natin dito.

Una, pagmamahal ng isang ina sa kanyang anak na sukdulang ibigay ang sariling buhay para lamang mailabas sya sa mundong ibabaw. Napakaganda ng sinabi ng ina ni Benjamin sa asawa nito, “Please make sure you keep him safe.” Hanggang sa huling hininga ng kanyang ina ay kapakanan pa ng kanyang anak ang kanyang iniisip. Sa eksenang ito, masasabi kong si Benjamin na marahil ang pinaka swerteng sanggol na ipinanganak.

Pangalawa, ay ang pagmamahal na ipinakita ng kanyang ama. Naisip ko, mahal nya kaya talaga ang kanyang anak? Ginawa nya kaya talaga kung ano ang sa tingin nya ay makabubuti para dito? Hindi naman nya ito pinatay, subalit hindi rin naman nya ito inalagaan. Ang sa akin lang, ang pagmamahal ay laging katuwang ng pagtanggap. Nakakalungkot isipin na ang sarili nyang ama ay hindi sya natanggap sa simula pa lang. Nakakalungkot na hindi sya binigyan ng pagkakataong mapatunayan kung ano ang kaya nyang gawin. Nakakalungkot na sya ay hinusgahan base sa panlabas na kaanyuan. Paano natin maaasahang maintindihan tayo ng lipunan kung ang sarili nating mga tahanan, na syang dapat magtuturo sa atin ng pangunawa at pagmamahal, ay agad na tayong tinalikuran?

Kung binasa ko ang librong “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” marahil ay nabagot ako. May mga eksena kse dito tungkol sa World War II. Ewan ko ba, pero hindi lang siguro talaga ako ganun kainteresado sa mga giyera at digmaan.

Sa pag unawa sa buhay, naisip kong hindi naman importante kung tumanda ka o bumabata habang nagtatagal. Ang importante ay natuto kang magbigay, magmahal, magpatawad at magparaya. Ang mahalaga ay bumabangon ka sa bawat pagkakadapa at natututong mangarap muli sa bawat pagkabigo.

Sa huli, tumatanda man ang isang tao o bumabata, ang lahat ay mauuwi rin naman sa pinaka pinal na yugto ng buhay --- kamatayan. Pero ano nga ba ang kamatayan? Isang katapusan? Hindi ba’t ito ay panibagong simula rin lang naman. Panibagong simula para sa namaalam at panibagong simula para sa kanyang mga naiwan.

Ang lahat ay totoong hiram lamang --- ang oras, pamilya, kaibigan, kalusugan, karunungan, kayamanan. Lahat, pagdating ng takdang oras ay kukuhanin din sa atin. Ang mahalaga ay natuto tayong pahalagahan ang lahat ng ito habang tayo ay nabubuhay. Ang mahalaga ay naibahagi natin sa iba ang mga biyayang sa atin ay ipinagkaloob. At higit na mahalaga ay natuto tayong igalang at mahalin ang ating mga sarili gayun din ang ating kapwa.

Komplikado ang buhay. Habang higit mo itong pilit na iniintindi ay lalo mo itong hindi naiintindihan. Naisip ko lang, kapag nilisan na kaya natin ang mundong ito, baon kaya natin ang ating mga alala o maging iyon ay kukunin din sa atin? Kung kuhanin ang lahat sa atin, dapat ba tayong maging malungkot o dapat ba tayong maging masaya dahil minsan ito ay sa atin?

Napaka hiwaga talaga ng buhay. Lahat ng ating pinagdadaanan ay nagmumulat sa atin sa mga panibagong katanungan na pilit naman nating hahanapan ng mga bagong kasagutan.

Sa huli, lahat naman ay mauuwi rin talaga sa pagmamahal. At pwede lang tayong mangarap na totoong mahal nga natin ang ating mga sarili, na mahal natin kung ano tayo ngayon --- bunga ng lahat ng ating mga pinagdaanan.Kung totoong mahal natin an gating mga sarili, magawi man tayo sa dulo ng walang hanggan, hindi na natin kailangan pang matakot dahil sat nay na pagmamahal maaari na tayong lumipad.

Life is like a box of crayons.

Life is like a box of crayons.

At birth, you're given a great big box of them to share and add color to your life. Some colors get used more than others.

Sometimes, a crayon gets broken. A Bright color gets snapped in half and tossed in the garbage can, never to be returned. Sometimes you keep coloring. Sometimes you can't. That color was important.

Sometimes a crayon is gained, shared between two people. That color might be just perfect, and works great! Other times it's a different shade, but it will make do.

But, there is always one color left in the box.

Black.

It's normally unused until death. It's used to frame the picture. To add the final border to the coloring board of life.

Some people use it. They color onto other's pictures with it. Sometimes their own.

They use it to scribble out portions of the picture. Sometimes the portion isn't that important.

Sometimes it is.

Sometimes there are multiple blacks in the box when you open it for the day...

Sometimes there's only one, or it isn't even there.

It all depends, really.

All depends on the crayon box and the one who holds it.

SHOULD YOU

Here’s something good to start my week.

With all that is happening in my life right now --- malicious comments from other people, death of a dear friend… I really need to stop, breath, stop questioning God, thank Him and just continually be a blessing to the people around me.

An excerpt from the novel Tuesday's with Morrie by Mitch Albom says: "Many people walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half-asleep, even when they're busy doing things they think are important. This is because they're chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning."

I don’t want to be one of those people. I don’t want to be half-dead… half-asleep.

So, here I am… trying to live my life one day at a time. After all, all we really have is borrowed time. All we have is today… this moment… no one knows for sure when our clock would stop ticking for us…

So let’s make the most of today.

Here’s something that inspired me… hoping it will inspire you too.

Should you have a bad day at work…
Think of the man who has been out of work for years.

Should you despair over a relationship gone bad…
Think of the person who has never known what it's like to love and be loved in return.

Should you grieve the passing of another weekend…
Think of the woman in dire straits, working twelve hours a day, seven days a week to feed her children.

Should your car break down, leaving you miles away from assistance…
Think of the paraplegic who would love the opportunity to take that walk.

Should you notice a new gray hair in the mirror…
Think of the cancer patient in chemo who wishes she had hair to examine.

Should you find yourself at a loss and pondering what is life all about, asking what is my purpose?
Be thankful.
There are those who didn't live long enough to get the opportunity.

Should you find yourself the victim of other people's bitterness, ignorance, smallness or insecurities…

Remember, things could be worse.

You could be them.


Have a nice week everyone.

Love you all.

May your soul rest in peace

Can you imagine what it feels like to have someone sit you down and tell you that you're dying? The gravity of that, huh?

Then the clock starts ticking for you…

In a split second your awe is cracked open. You look at things differently --- smell things differently. You savor everything be it a glass of water or a walk in the park.

But most people have the luxury of not knowing when that clock's going to go off. And the irony of it is that that keeps them from really living their life. It keeps them drinking that glass of water but never really tasting it.

I just found out today, that a good friend of mine died yesterday morning due to brain tumor and I can’t help but ask why. Good heavens why him? I mean, he is so young for crying out loud. He still has a lot to live… a lot to fulfill…

My knees got weak, my voice escaped me and I am left here standing… wondering why it had to be you... imagining what we would be doing if you weren't set before me… ever so pale… ever so different... ever so cold…

We say that the hour of death cannot be forecasted, but when we say this we imagine that hour as placed in an obscure and distant future. It never occurs to us that it has any connection with the day already begun or that death could arrive this same afternoon, this afternoon which is so certain and which has every hour filled in advance.

It's never going to get easier.

There is never going to be a 'Death for Dummies' book. There is never going to be an escape plan to pain because no matter how much I try no matter how much I cry my life is never going to go back to the way it used to be, because I know I can't just text you on your cell phone and hope everything disappears.

I know that I can't stop myself from hoping that one day I will just receive a text from you and smile as if nothing happened.

I know that there will be days that it will be hard to get out of bed and look people in the eye and lie when they ask how I am.

I know that its going to hurt for the rest of my life and that I will always cry, but I also know that you're in heaven now and your away from all of the pain and everything is better for you now.

I just wish I could say the same for me.

Sometimes, no matter how much faith we have, we lose people. But we never forget them.

And I promise, I will never forget you.

So long Joms…

*** Friends, please join me in praying for the eternal repose of my friend’s soul. Thank you.