This is my Life

I had always heard your entire life flashes in front of your eyes the second before you die.

I doubt that!! But I don’t totally dispute it. =)

First of all, that one second isn't a second at all, it stretches on forever, like an ocean of time... and it never stops... it just goes on and on and on...

For me, it was lying on my back at the attic of our house one starry Friday night, watching falling stars...

And yellow leaves, from the bayabas trees, that lined my streets...

Or my grandmother's hands, and the way her skin seemed like paper...

Or my one true love way back when I was a freshman in college…

My first kiss… my second embrace… my third phone sex or my plenty one night stands…

The first time I got hurt or the most recent lie I said...

My graduation ball… my licensure examination… my new haircut or my unconventional fashion statement…

…the endless walks and talks I enjoyed doing with my loved ones and the contagious laughs of my friends…

And Kristof...

And VJ...

And... Jaime.

I guess I could be pretty pissed off about what happened to me... but it's hard to stay mad, when there's so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much, my heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst...

...and then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain and I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life...

You have no idea what I'm talking about, I'm sure. But don't worry...

You will someday.