One Angry Dwarf and two Hundred Solemn Faces

My friends kept telling me that it wouldn't last, that one day we would go our own separate ways. I didn't listen. They told me I would only get hurt and I shouldn't stay... I still didn't listen. But now, as our relationship is ending, I really wish that I had listened to my friends’ advice, because if I did, I wouldn't be hurting like I am now.

I wish I wouldn't have stopped one of my friends from having a box of dog shit anonymously delivered to your doorstep. Although I find delightful, demented humor in that, I know you would have only blamed me for sending it.

I wish I could cut your dick off without my name being nationally broadcasted throughout the media. I also don't want to be criminally prosecuted.

I wish I could push a red button that would strategically drop an atomic bomb on your fucking house leaving no collateral damage.

I wish I had dark magic powers that would prevent you from ever passing the nursing board exams.

Most of all, I wish I could rewind some of my life... I would have chosen not to have met you.

But on second thought, I PROBABLY WON'T. It is such a waste of time to even wish anything for you.

Sometimes I wonder if you just faked our whole relationship... if you ever really did care.... if I ever really did know the feeling of how it felt to be loved and to love... maybe I just made the whole thing out to be more than it was because you are with him now. You've been so into him for only God knows how long... and my dreams and hopes of love are suddenly shattered... because I know now that when I call out your name at night... you are calling out his... and there's nothing in the world that hurts more... than knowing the only man I've ever loved... is out there loving someone else.

I'm simply a boy who fell in love. Well, that's what I used to think. But now I know that I'm just a guy who was charmed by a boy then used and left behind.

You killed me. You killed every hope I have left. I can't even pretend to be happy anymore. It's not worth pretending.

Am I mad at you?

That's your main concern after shattering my whole world?

Mad For what?

For breaking my heart?

All the lies?

Maybe for letting me put all my trust in you only to be betray the decency to tell me to my face?? How about the fact that you didn't even care the way you think its crazy that I'm crying over it, because you think breaking up is no big deal?

Am I mad?

No.

More like crushed. Did I ever even really know you?

I've made it through a lot, but only because I've always had this love to count on to be there for me through it all.

Now that I've lost that, I'm lost and alone and I don't think I'll make it this time.

I hope that makes you happy.