I Love You Dee

I Love You.

I look at those words and they deflate me. Eight letters (well, seven technically, because you use the "o" twice). Just three simple words are supposed to make you understand how I feel for you. Eskimos have 50 billion words for snow, and yet I'm supposed to say "I Love You," a phrase that can mean a billion different things.

I learned to say those words before I could even form a complete sentence! Through the years I've said them to a lot of people and each time it's meant something different. I've said it to relatives as a way to goodbye. I've said it to friends as a way to say, hey man you're funny and cool. I even said it to the lady at the bank when I got my first credit card.

So why is some generic phrase such as "I Love You" the best they've come up with for expressing your most personal and deepest feelings to the person you intend to spend the rest of your life with? Maybe because it fits on those little candy hearts...

Well, guess what? You mean more than just those eight letters to me. You mean more than any words can describe.

I wish you could feel my emotions, because "I Love You" just doesn't describe the way I feel about you. You should wear my soul like a wetsuit and experience the tingling that occurs under my skin while I sit in my station and daydream of you. Or maybe you could be there as my brain cranks up each morning (technically afternoon, since we both work graveyard) and rolls the first two products off its assembly line; your name and my smile.

You should be able to undergo the explosions of happiness that shoot from my eyeballs when I talk to you and about you. And you need to experience how my heart becomes saturated with orgasms when I know I've made you happy, or feel what it's like to throw up a rainbow just by realizing that you exist.

I will always tell you "I Love You," even though I'll never think the words mean enough. But, just remember that when I say it to you, it means something exclusive, shared only between me and you. And feelings that only you can generate will ride on the words and fill up my soul every time I say it.

Now, and forever, whether I'm saying it as goodbye, or because I think you're funny and cool, or even because you gave me my first credit card, "I Love You" today and "I Love You" tonight and "I Love You" tomorrow. "I Love You" this week, this month, this year....

Forever.

I have never loved anyone before you. I know that to be true, because nobody has ever made me feel what you make me feel. I know we are meant to be together and I will do everything possible to make that happen.

I Love You Dee.